Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Temper Temper

Written By Daniel Steele
Baltimore Sun

This was a great weekend for anger-management trainers, and a bad one for proponents of such virtues as self-control and professionalism. Milton Bradley (in a tandem with umpire Eric Winters) and DeAngelo Hall seemed a little touchy. Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy, who we'll discuss in a subsequent post, took it to another level.

* The Padres are probably going to miss the playoffs because of what went down among Bradley, Winters, manager Bud Black and first base coach Bobby Meacham. Has a player-umpire confrontation ever done so much damage? The only one that comes to mind is the Roberto Alomar spitting incident, and that damaged Alomar's image more than anything. It didn't affect the pennant race; the Orioles already were locked into a playoff berth (which tells you how long ago it happened). It's interesting to note, though, that both the Alomar case and the blow-up in San Diego involve allegations of umpire name-calling. It's just as interesting that the reaction by fans and others has been that no matter what vile thing Winters is accused of saying to Bradley (Meacham, the coach, backed up Bradley's story), it's all Bradley's fault for taking the alleged bait, a textbook case of the victim's reputation preceding him. If Bradley is Ron Artest, then Winters appears to be a combination of Ben Wallace and the fan who threw the cup.

Meanwhile, manager Bud Black has to be a basket case by now. He was only doing his job, trying to keep his player from bum-rushing the ump and getting suspended -- and he ends up wrenching the guy's knee. It's a miracle, actually, that it hasn't happened more often, the way some players and coaches have to be restrained sometimes -- and how often umps keep arguments going long after they should have ended. OK, it's another one of those dumb baseball traditions, umpires and managers/players going eye-to-eye and saliva gland-to-saliva gland. But it's completely unacceptable from both sides in every other sport known to man -- and thus, there are no other incidents that come to mind of someone blowing out an ACL arguing with an ump.

Bottom line: Bradley should get a refund for the anger-management classes he took a few years ago; Winters, the ump, should sign up for some of his own, and Black should work on his footwork and leverage for next time he's wrestling one of his own players.

* If what DeAngelo Hall did on Sunday in Atlanta when his Falcons lost to Carolina has ever been matched -- he was personally responsible for 67 penalty yards on one possession, including two personal fouls -- I beg you to let me know here. And it happened to be on the drive on which Carolina tied the game and never looked back. Plus, all the penalties were against wideout Steve Smith, and the last one was, basically, for running his mouth too much after the play was over -- a third-down play that was about to force Carolina to try a long field goal, but instead kept the drive alive.

And, as Smith himself described the so-called "trash talk,'' "They were real minute ... just real immature stuff.'' Take his word for it, he's an expert in the field.

Now, talking stuff per se is not a problem, especially if it's good stuff and a player can back it up. Hall usually scores on both counts. He was, in fact, backing it up against Smith that day, until that drive. Then, a 37-yard interference call. Then a cheap shot on Smith at the line of scrimmage away from the ball. Then the mouthing off to Smith as he left the field.

Now, new coach Bobby Petrino plans to discipline Hall, and he hashed out ideas with his veterans, which tells you that it isn't just Petrino who's mad about this. Hall buried his own teammates by getting caught up in some stupid personal feud that could have been settled by a bunch of pithy quotes in the locker room after the game.

Bottom line: looks like the Falcons didn't get all the poison out of their locker room when Michael Vick was sent up the river.

Daybreak Counseling Service

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Anger Management Classes-Daybreak Counseling Service

Daybreak Counseling Service provides quality anger management classes, anger management courses and anger management executive coaching. Classes are taught by Masters level professional in a non-judgemental enviroment. Anger Management classes are available to adults, adolescents, couples. Seminars are available for corporations and goverment agencies.


Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Lava Flow-The Anger Management Game 1.0

I am proud to announce that Daybreak Counseling Service has added a unique weapon to its arsenal against anger.

Lava Flow-The Anger Management Game was launced yesterday. This new Flash Quiz game is designed to help clients learn more about anger management education.

Lava Flow- The Anger Management Game is the first in the line of many interactive teaching tools that will be introduced by Daybreak Counseling Service. Although our first game may not be state of the art virtual muliti-player game play we feel it is a good start to a great future.


Daybreak Counseling Service
Shannon Munford M.A.

Media Frenzy for Anger Management Information

Anderson & Anderson Certified Anger Management are being inundated by print, television and radio personalities for appearances and interviews. George Anderson and Shannon Munford were featured in a front page article in the Daily Breeze Newspaper which appeared on Labor Day.

A therapist from Shannon’s company will appear on the premiere episode of the “Decision House” TV show on My Network TV Channel 13 at 8 p.m. Wednesday. During the episode, the counselor works with a feuding couple.

Carlos Todd was interviewed on Sept. 6, by the local CBS affiliate in Charlotte, North Carolina. Several weeks ago, he was interviewed for an article which appeared in the local news paper.

Colbert Williams, whose practice is based in Lancaster, CA. has appeared on a local talk show, interviewed for an upcoming CNN segment on anger management and was the subject of a newspaper article on workplace anger.

Gregory Kyles was contacted during the last week by the Montel Williams show.

George Anderson has been contacted by The Tyra Banks Show, Dr. Phil, MTV, ESPN, Toronto Star and the Today Show. Currently, a sitcom is in the works based on the Anderson & Anderson anger management practice.

All of this media interest and coverage is increasing the public’s awareness of anger management in general and the Anderson & Anderson model in particular.

George Anderson, MSW, BCD

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Taking office rage into the ring

September 3, 2007


If the caustic title of the e-mail, "You Are Worthless," was not enough to make the information technology worker on the receiving end look over his shoulder, perhaps its venomous substance did.

"I hope some day the rest of the office sees you for the small . . . pathetic IT loser you are and beats you within an inch of your life in the parking lot," read the message sent through annoyingcoworker.net, an online service that allows workers exasperated with colleagues to confront them with anonymous e-mails.

Verbal outbursts, furtive acts of cubicle sabotage and spontaneous destruction of furniture abound in the modern workplace. The office rage has even extended into cyberspace, spawning online forums where workers detail their gripes with the gum-snapping in the next pod.

Now a New York-based film production company is looking to tap the unbridled vitriol of pencil pushers everywhere for a reality television show that would pit adversarial co-workers against each other in full-on fisticuffs.

The brainchild of Red Line Films, Office Fight would have colleagues agree to train for two weeks with a professional pugilist and ultimately duke out their differences over three rounds in their office or a gym. The company is now soliciting volunteers for a pilot.

A recent stroll around the financial district in Toronto, perhaps the citadel of office culture in Canada, revealed no apparent shortage of repressed aggression bursting from the buttoned-up collars on Bay Street.

"Oh, I could think of a few people right now that I'd like to fight," said Mark, 26, an impeccably groomed law student who inhaled a Players outside his corporate law office recently with the edgy enthusiasm of a man on the brink of a breakdown.

For three months he has been articling at the firm, which, along with his last name, he asked not be published for fear of recrimination. Pushy partners and associates were working him to the bone, he said. But it was the constant tink, tink, tink of fingernails being clipped in their offices that was pushing Mark overboard.

"Just seeing them every day at this point is enough to make me want to fight them," he said. "I mean, cutting your fingernails in the office? It's disgusting!"

Two blocks north, nail clippers could offer a welcome respite from the tap, tap, tap that 31-year-old insurance adjuster Adam said he endures day in and day out at the hands of a female colleague with overgrown and intricately decorated nails.

"Give me the clippers, I'll cut them myself," said Adam, who works for a major insurance firm and asked that his last name and the name of his company not be printed. "I wouldn't fight her over it because she's a girl, but there are days I'd like to pull them out with a pair of pliers."

Workplace horror stories are as common as a filched sandwich from the lunchroom refrigerator.

There is the know-it-all colleague who suffers from smartest-person-in-the-room syndrome; the overbearing boss whose criticism is as gentle as Leona Helmsley, and the gossip so vicious a sixth-grade girl is tame by comparison.

Despite the irritation, 54 per cent of respondents in an online survey conducted last year by truejobs.com said they had never considered confronting their tormentor.

Workers tend to keep their grievances with others bottled up because they fear a backlash and because they believe their gripes won't be taken seriously, said Kevin Kelloway, a professor of management at Saint Mary's University in Nova Scotia.

"Most of us don't have the option of leaving our job, and if we confront someone and it goes wrong, you're going to have to live with it every day," Dr. Kelloway said. "The most likely reaction is that a supervisor will tell you to grow up and deal with it."

Over the years, he has heard countless instances of workplace violence, from the underling who threatened colleagues with a hunting knife to a subordinate defecating in his boss's car. He said that by far the most common complaint is that a co-worker isn't pulling his or her weight.

The inclination to avoid confrontation has given rise to a host of websites that provide a forum for workers to gripe.

Annoyingcoworker.net is loaded with hostile ("You are pathetic ... and everybody hates you") and at times humorous ("When you eat onions for lunch your breath smells like baby poo ...") e-mails sent through the site to recipients unaware of their irksome ways.

At another site, disgruntledworkforce.com, people shielded by the anonymity of the Internet rant without consequences about their "pointless meetings" and their "lazy, disgusting co-workers."

Some people, however, take their anger public.

A 2006 survey of about 2,900 workers in the United States found that 41 per cent reported experiencing some form of psychological aggression, including being threatened or having obscenities shouted at them. Six per cent said they were victims of physical violence.

In Canada, about 1,000 violent incidents a day are reported in the workplace, according to Statistics Canada, although the vast majority are in professions that deal directly with the public, such as driving a bus or taxi.

Aaron Schat, an assistant professor of organizational behaviour at McMaster University who worked on the U.S. poll, sees what he calls "covert aggression" like spreading rumours as being particularly damaging to workplace peace.

"People tend to complain to other people and just seethe and that's not healthy either," Dr. Schat said. "Confrontation can be useful and good, but it really does depend on the nature of the issue and the type of confrontation."

Bullies at work

On a day intended to give labourers across the country an escape from the stress of work, millions are fretting about returning to their jobs because of a workplace bully, a recent survey suggests.

Nearly half of all workers in the United States reported having suffered or witnessed workplace bullying such as verbal insults, job sabotage and abuse of authority, according to a Zogby Interactive poll conducted for the Workplace Bullying Institute.

The survey found that 37 per cent of workers are currently being pushed around or have been bullied by a colleague at some point in their lifetime, and 40 per cent of those people said harassment had pushed them to quit in the past.

"It's clearly a silent epidemic," said Gary Namie, director of the institute, a non-profit organization based in Washington State seeking to eradicate workplace aggression.

Forty per cent of victims reported never complaining about the bullying, while 62 per cent said notifying their boss had resulted either in no change in the behaviour or an escalation of it. Perhaps that is because bosses were identified as the culprits in nearly three-quarters of bullying cases.

Women reported being victimized more than men - 57 per cent to 43 per cent - and said their aggressors were far more likely to be other women. Aggression perpetrated by men was inflicted almost evenly on men and women.

The online poll surveyed 7,740 workers across the United States in August.

Daybreak Counseling Service