The term "'b**** fighting" is what some women privately call a pier room brawl that a pack of girls or young women engage in with one another. The term and the behavior is loathsome and offensive. But it was that sort of brawl that claimed the life of 23-year-old Shontae Blanche, and even more shockingly, her 7 month unborn child. The young expectant mother and part time student was killed when another young woman allegedly ran over her and dragged her.
Blanche had tried to break up a fight between a dozen women at a service station in South Los Angeles in early November. The women were young, "Black," and reportedly some had ties with gang members. They had gathered at the station to battle it out following a dispute between two of the women.
The altercation did more than claim the life of a young mother. It tossed the ugly glare on an age old problem that has grown worse in the past few years. And that's the escalation in violence by and among young women.
A decade ago the Center for Women's Policy Studies published a landmark study on girls and violence. More than one third of girls they surveyed said that they had engaged in physical fights within a year's time. Nearly 20 percent said they carried weapons.
And nearly half said they believed that girls were nearly as violent as boys. A Justice Department study found that from the mid-1980s to the mid-1990s the number of women jailed for violent crimes had more than doubled.
A decade later the willingness of more young women, especially black women, to resort to fisticuffs and even weapons to settle disputes or commit crimes has become an even bigger problem.
Girls Inc., a non profit advocacy group that monitors violence by and toward young women, found that far more black girls were injured in school fights than white girls.
The spiraling cycle of violence that entraps many black girls was on naked and tormenting display last year when nine black girls were hauled into a Long Beach, California court in shackles.
The girls were charged with a violent hate crime attack on three young white women on Halloween night in 2006 in Long Beach.
The sight of so many girls standing trial at one time on a charge, especially the hate crimes charge, was rare. But the sight of so many black girls in a court docket and increasingly in America's juvenile jails and prisons has become anything but rare.
"Black Women" in some states are being "imprisoned" at "alarming rates." And they are being jailed at younger ages than ever. An American Bar Association study in 2001 found that teen girls account for more than one-quarter of the juvenile arrests.
They are charged with more violent crimes, and are being shoved back into detention centers after release, in some cases even faster than boys.
The ABA has not done a follow-up study since then to determine if there's been any change in the troubling dilemma so many black girls face in the juvenile system. But, almost certainly, the high arrest and incarceration rate for black teen girls is likely the same if not greater today, and many of them are there for violent crimes.
They have engaged in physical fights and assaults, and even school yard brawls with other girls, or even boys.
The explanations for the up tick in female violence are varied. The near glorification of the male code of toughness to get ahead in business, politics, and sport has virtually been enshrined as a prized virtue in society. Women have not been immune from it.
There's the bloat of Gladiator spectacles such as WWF matches with women tossing each other around in a ring, posturing, swaggering, and cussing like drunken sailors, and barroom toughs. The toughness virtue has even slipped into politics. In polls, women by big margins said the thing they admire most about Hillary Clinton is her toughness.
Many young black women are continually exposed to violence in their communities. They have ties with male gang members, they themselves are members of gangs, or they have committed assaults.
The Center for Women's Policy Studies also found that many of the women that engaged in physical fights have been victims of rape, assault, or robbery.
This further imprints the tacit stamp that violence is the pervasive method to control, dominate, bully, and gain advantage over people and situations.
There's a double dilemma for the girls and young women that commit violent acts. The risk is great that they can be maimed, killed or wind up serving a long prison stretch.
And since violence is still thought of almost exclusively as a male preserve, there's a near total absence of studies on the causes and consequences of female violence.
That means even fewer fewer resources, programs and support outlets to keep at-risk girls and young women out of harm's way and from harming other women. The "Blanche Killing" is tragic proof of that.
Earl Ofari Hutchinson is an author and political analyst. His new book is The Latino Challenge to Black America: Towards a Conversation between African-Americans and Hispanics (Middle Passage Press and Hispanic Economics New York).
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Friday, November 16, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Do you have trouble shutting your mouth when angry?
"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret." If you answered yes to the title question I am sure you have realized the truth in this quote by Ambrose Bierce. In order to gain control over your tongue you must be determined to see things differently. People who lose their temper tend to view life in a negative and judgmental way. You have the ability to direct your mind away from angry and upset feelings. You need to realize that you can have peace of mind instead of conflict.
This article will cover a variety of mindsets and behaviors that will teach you how to keep your mouth shut when you are angry.
1) Be quick to listen and slow to speak. Remember that you have two ears and only one mouth. Use them in this proportion. It's better to be a good listener than to be a good speaker. Listen carefully to what the other person has to say. Take your time before giving them an answer.
2) Don't be double minded. You can't have peace of mind and conflict at the same time. Be clearly focused on the outcome that you want. (Example: "I want to go to bed tonight feeling close to my partner.").
3) You can't be right and be married. You have to decide "Do you want to be right or do you want to be married?" Trying to be right will destroy the connection between you. Instead, strive to do the right thing.
4) Don't jump to conclusions. Slow down and think through the situation.
5) Don't say the first thing that comes into your head. I often hear people say, "I cannot keep from saying the thoughts I have." You can and you must.
6) As I was writing this, my daughter reminded me of Thumper's quote in the movie, "Bambi". "If you can't say something nice…don't say nothing at all." This is always good advice.
7) Don't overreact to criticism. Beneath the criticism is an underlying message. Criticism is a smoke screen for deeper feelings. I compare criticism to cheese on a mousetrap. What happens when the mouse takes the cheese? He gets his tail caught in the trap. That's what happens when you take the bait of criticism. Don't take the bait. Listen for the underlying message.
8) Stay away from negative thoughts and statements like, "I hate this!" "This is driving me crazy!" "I can't stand this!" These types of statements are like throwing gasoline on a fire. You are making it much more intense. Replace these with positive declarations such as "I can handle this." "This is not that big of a deal." "I have unshakeable peace of mind." "Nothing bothers me." Your thoughts will direct your emotions. Choose positive thoughts that help you keep your peace.
9) If someone uses absolute terms like "always", "never", "everybody", and "nobody"; don't take them literally. These are emotional terms. If your wife says "You never take me anywhere." and you know that's not true; don't take it as a personal attack. Try and hear her underlying request that she needs to know she is special and she wants to spend some time with you.
10) Don't overreact and don't give advice too quickly. This only trains people not to be open with you.
11) Don't try to get in the last word. It's not worth the damage you could do by trying to win or be heard.
12) If you are angry repeat this scripture based verse in your head, "In all things be self controlled." Say it over and over so that you don't get derailed into an argument.
13) There is life and death in the spoken word. Make sure your words build people up versus tearing them down.
14) Remember to breathe. Stick with the basics. When you are upset, take a few deep breaths.
15) Strive to use an approach that promotes honor and respect. This can make the difference between a twenty minute argument and a 3 day war.
16) Realize that your anger most likely is not going to help solve the problem and may actually make the matter worse.
17) Calmness will help you get to the heart of the matter. This leads to conflict resolution. Trying to be right or show your might will lead to conflict.
18) Staying connected is more important than making your point.
The only one who is responsible for the way your life works out is you. You cannot change the past, but you can take responsibility for your future. All it takes is a decision. Decide to live a life of discipline rather than one of regret. Remember that discipline weighs ounces and regret weighs tons. Develop the power of a tamed tongue.
Author's Bio
Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at South Georgia Psychiatric and Counseling Center in Valdosta. He is the author of How To Be A Great Partner. Read more of his articles at http://www.TheRelationshipSpecialist.com
Sign up for his free newsletter at http://www.PowerfulRelationshipAdvice.com
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
This article will cover a variety of mindsets and behaviors that will teach you how to keep your mouth shut when you are angry.
1) Be quick to listen and slow to speak. Remember that you have two ears and only one mouth. Use them in this proportion. It's better to be a good listener than to be a good speaker. Listen carefully to what the other person has to say. Take your time before giving them an answer.
2) Don't be double minded. You can't have peace of mind and conflict at the same time. Be clearly focused on the outcome that you want. (Example: "I want to go to bed tonight feeling close to my partner.").
3) You can't be right and be married. You have to decide "Do you want to be right or do you want to be married?" Trying to be right will destroy the connection between you. Instead, strive to do the right thing.
4) Don't jump to conclusions. Slow down and think through the situation.
5) Don't say the first thing that comes into your head. I often hear people say, "I cannot keep from saying the thoughts I have." You can and you must.
6) As I was writing this, my daughter reminded me of Thumper's quote in the movie, "Bambi". "If you can't say something nice…don't say nothing at all." This is always good advice.
7) Don't overreact to criticism. Beneath the criticism is an underlying message. Criticism is a smoke screen for deeper feelings. I compare criticism to cheese on a mousetrap. What happens when the mouse takes the cheese? He gets his tail caught in the trap. That's what happens when you take the bait of criticism. Don't take the bait. Listen for the underlying message.
8) Stay away from negative thoughts and statements like, "I hate this!" "This is driving me crazy!" "I can't stand this!" These types of statements are like throwing gasoline on a fire. You are making it much more intense. Replace these with positive declarations such as "I can handle this." "This is not that big of a deal." "I have unshakeable peace of mind." "Nothing bothers me." Your thoughts will direct your emotions. Choose positive thoughts that help you keep your peace.
9) If someone uses absolute terms like "always", "never", "everybody", and "nobody"; don't take them literally. These are emotional terms. If your wife says "You never take me anywhere." and you know that's not true; don't take it as a personal attack. Try and hear her underlying request that she needs to know she is special and she wants to spend some time with you.
10) Don't overreact and don't give advice too quickly. This only trains people not to be open with you.
11) Don't try to get in the last word. It's not worth the damage you could do by trying to win or be heard.
12) If you are angry repeat this scripture based verse in your head, "In all things be self controlled." Say it over and over so that you don't get derailed into an argument.
13) There is life and death in the spoken word. Make sure your words build people up versus tearing them down.
14) Remember to breathe. Stick with the basics. When you are upset, take a few deep breaths.
15) Strive to use an approach that promotes honor and respect. This can make the difference between a twenty minute argument and a 3 day war.
16) Realize that your anger most likely is not going to help solve the problem and may actually make the matter worse.
17) Calmness will help you get to the heart of the matter. This leads to conflict resolution. Trying to be right or show your might will lead to conflict.
18) Staying connected is more important than making your point.
The only one who is responsible for the way your life works out is you. You cannot change the past, but you can take responsibility for your future. All it takes is a decision. Decide to live a life of discipline rather than one of regret. Remember that discipline weighs ounces and regret weighs tons. Develop the power of a tamed tongue.
Author's Bio
Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at South Georgia Psychiatric and Counseling Center in Valdosta. He is the author of How To Be A Great Partner. Read more of his articles at http://www.TheRelationshipSpecialist.com
Sign up for his free newsletter at http://www.PowerfulRelationshipAdvice.com
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Anger Management vs. Incarceration
A recent ruling and sentencing by a Long Beach Juvenile Superior Court has a community in outrage.
Nine African-American juveniles were convicted of assaulting 3 white women on Halloween 2006. Prosecutors made attempts to label the altercation as a brutal hate crime.
The juveniles remained in custody for approximately 3 months and were recently released on probation. The juveniles were sentenced to 60 days home detention, 250 hours of community service and undergo anger management classes.
The victims of the assault were angered as they anticipated a harsher sentence.
The juvenile court is built on the premise that rehabilitation is favored over punishment when working with youth. The courts ruling substantiates the effectiveness of Anger Management Classes.
Juvenile courts as well as adult courts rely on anger management classes as a rehabilitation tool. Effective anger management education centers, such as Daybreak Counseling Service provide an alternative to long prison terms for violent offenders. Such practices are beneficial to the offenders and cost effective to city governments, as housing offenders can be a taxing to financially strained counties.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Nine African-American juveniles were convicted of assaulting 3 white women on Halloween 2006. Prosecutors made attempts to label the altercation as a brutal hate crime.
The juveniles remained in custody for approximately 3 months and were recently released on probation. The juveniles were sentenced to 60 days home detention, 250 hours of community service and undergo anger management classes.
The victims of the assault were angered as they anticipated a harsher sentence.
The juvenile court is built on the premise that rehabilitation is favored over punishment when working with youth. The courts ruling substantiates the effectiveness of Anger Management Classes.
Juvenile courts as well as adult courts rely on anger management classes as a rehabilitation tool. Effective anger management education centers, such as Daybreak Counseling Service provide an alternative to long prison terms for violent offenders. Such practices are beneficial to the offenders and cost effective to city governments, as housing offenders can be a taxing to financially strained counties.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Friday, October 5, 2007
Police officer ordered to anger management classes after shooting
HOUSTON (Map, News) - An off-duty Pasadena police officer who shot at a man in a road rage incident earlier this year was placed on probation and ordered to attend anger management classes Wednesday.
A jury found Marcus Justin Kacz guilty of deadly conduct. Visiting Judge Jim Larkin sentenced Kacz to 18 months probation for the misdemeanor. In addition to anger management classes, Kacz was fined $400, ordered to do community service and to undergo random urine tests.
"I think you made a big mistake and showed bad judgment," Larkin told Kacz.
Prosecutors said Kacz, 26, chased a driver who cut him off. Kacz, who was not in uniform, shot at a passenger in the sport utility vehicle at least three times.
Defense attorney Greg Cagle said Kacz followed the sport utility vehicle because the driver was running red lights and driving dangerously.
"I'm disappointed with the verdict, but he's a young, smart guy and we'll appeal it," Cagle said in a story for Wednesday's online edition of the Houston Chronicle.
Sgt. W.J. Fojt testified that it is against Pasadena Police Department policy for off-duty officers to pursue suspects.
"The evidence was against him," Michael Dannenbaum, jury foreman, told the newspaper. "He did not discharge the firearm to protect himself, and Pasadena's policy prohibits off-duty officers from pursuing chases."
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
A jury found Marcus Justin Kacz guilty of deadly conduct. Visiting Judge Jim Larkin sentenced Kacz to 18 months probation for the misdemeanor. In addition to anger management classes, Kacz was fined $400, ordered to do community service and to undergo random urine tests.
"I think you made a big mistake and showed bad judgment," Larkin told Kacz.
Prosecutors said Kacz, 26, chased a driver who cut him off. Kacz, who was not in uniform, shot at a passenger in the sport utility vehicle at least three times.
Defense attorney Greg Cagle said Kacz followed the sport utility vehicle because the driver was running red lights and driving dangerously.
"I'm disappointed with the verdict, but he's a young, smart guy and we'll appeal it," Cagle said in a story for Wednesday's online edition of the Houston Chronicle.
Sgt. W.J. Fojt testified that it is against Pasadena Police Department policy for off-duty officers to pursue suspects.
"The evidence was against him," Michael Dannenbaum, jury foreman, told the newspaper. "He did not discharge the firearm to protect himself, and Pasadena's policy prohibits off-duty officers from pursuing chases."
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Thursday, October 4, 2007
The consequences of Anger
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
–Ambrose Bierce
Anger and the ATM
At the time I am writing this post, the average anger management class is going to cost you between $600 and $2500. In addition to court fees most courts will order 12-52 weeks of anger management. This adds up to hours of sitting in class, time away from your family, time away from your job - as you may know time is money.
You may be saying to yourself, “Well my anger has not caused me any problems with the court or the police.” My response to you is “not yet.”
Denise was born and raised in Italy. She and her family moved to the United States when she was thirteen. She found adjustment to her new California lifestyle challenging. Denise felt as if she just did not fit in. Part of her difficulty was due to her slow absorption of the English language. During her high school years, she developed the habit of not expressing herself. She felt that if she voiced her opinions or her thoughts she would either be ridiculed or considered unintelligent because of her broken English. For years she kept her thoughts and emotions inside.
Now at twenty-one Denise spoke fluent English with little to no accent. She was a petite girl, 5’2 and no more than 105 pounds. She had long brown hair that she pulled into a ponytail. Tanned and toned, she entered my office in a fitted Jennifer Lopez sweat-suit. She had obviously assimilated to the L.A. culture. Although beautiful she still retained a quiet rural innocence.
Denise was a student at a local college when she found herself in a disagreeable and eventually costly position. If you have ever attended a major college you can understand how difficult and frustrating it is to find a parking space. Imagine that you’re late for class, and your building is halfway across the campus. Well the parking Gods smiled on Denise that day. As she pulled into the parking lot she slipped into a cozy outlined space waiting for her. With some time to spare, Denise applied her lip-gloss. She was using her rearview mirror when she noticed a meter maid joyfully detailing cars with parking tickets. As she watched for a while she noticed a trend. The meter maid only appeared to ticket students of races and nationalities not kin to her own. She felt confused and a little angry, but who was she to get involved, it was none of her business. Denise sucked it in and went to class.
The next day she witnessed the same thing. The exact same meter made appeared to be targeting and ticketing every student expect the ones of her own race. This time Denise was enraged. Why this is America! How could someone be allowed to continue such a discriminating act? She decided to speak her mind. Fuelled with the passion of injustice, Denise approached the meter maid. She explained how the meter maid’s actions were a violation of the student’s civic rights. She appealed to her since of equality. After all the meter maid was an African-American female. She could certainly relate to the sting of prejudice. Denise thought to herself, “Doesn’t she know about the women’s suffrage movement, the struggle of Dr. King and the NAACP?” Obviously, the meter maid did not know of Dr. King’s the struggle or did not care, because she promptly called campus police and had Denise arrested for obstructing the duties of a public officer.
Denise made bail at the price of $5000. She retained a lawyer at $250 an hour and was granted probation by the court, which charged her $290 in court fees. She is currently serving a three- year probation sentence and pays $100 a month to the probation department. By the time Denise completes her probation she would have made several trips to the ATM and paid close to $13,000 or more.
Believe it or not, the financial loss is the least destructive consequence of anger. In fact when we speak of “person centered aggression”, it is the cost to the victim that supersedes any financial loss. Let us take a look at how anger can destroy the lives of others around you.
Shannon Munford M.A.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
–Ambrose Bierce
Anger and the ATM
At the time I am writing this post, the average anger management class is going to cost you between $600 and $2500. In addition to court fees most courts will order 12-52 weeks of anger management. This adds up to hours of sitting in class, time away from your family, time away from your job - as you may know time is money.
You may be saying to yourself, “Well my anger has not caused me any problems with the court or the police.” My response to you is “not yet.”
Denise was born and raised in Italy. She and her family moved to the United States when she was thirteen. She found adjustment to her new California lifestyle challenging. Denise felt as if she just did not fit in. Part of her difficulty was due to her slow absorption of the English language. During her high school years, she developed the habit of not expressing herself. She felt that if she voiced her opinions or her thoughts she would either be ridiculed or considered unintelligent because of her broken English. For years she kept her thoughts and emotions inside.
Now at twenty-one Denise spoke fluent English with little to no accent. She was a petite girl, 5’2 and no more than 105 pounds. She had long brown hair that she pulled into a ponytail. Tanned and toned, she entered my office in a fitted Jennifer Lopez sweat-suit. She had obviously assimilated to the L.A. culture. Although beautiful she still retained a quiet rural innocence.
Denise was a student at a local college when she found herself in a disagreeable and eventually costly position. If you have ever attended a major college you can understand how difficult and frustrating it is to find a parking space. Imagine that you’re late for class, and your building is halfway across the campus. Well the parking Gods smiled on Denise that day. As she pulled into the parking lot she slipped into a cozy outlined space waiting for her. With some time to spare, Denise applied her lip-gloss. She was using her rearview mirror when she noticed a meter maid joyfully detailing cars with parking tickets. As she watched for a while she noticed a trend. The meter maid only appeared to ticket students of races and nationalities not kin to her own. She felt confused and a little angry, but who was she to get involved, it was none of her business. Denise sucked it in and went to class.
The next day she witnessed the same thing. The exact same meter made appeared to be targeting and ticketing every student expect the ones of her own race. This time Denise was enraged. Why this is America! How could someone be allowed to continue such a discriminating act? She decided to speak her mind. Fuelled with the passion of injustice, Denise approached the meter maid. She explained how the meter maid’s actions were a violation of the student’s civic rights. She appealed to her since of equality. After all the meter maid was an African-American female. She could certainly relate to the sting of prejudice. Denise thought to herself, “Doesn’t she know about the women’s suffrage movement, the struggle of Dr. King and the NAACP?” Obviously, the meter maid did not know of Dr. King’s the struggle or did not care, because she promptly called campus police and had Denise arrested for obstructing the duties of a public officer.
Denise made bail at the price of $5000. She retained a lawyer at $250 an hour and was granted probation by the court, which charged her $290 in court fees. She is currently serving a three- year probation sentence and pays $100 a month to the probation department. By the time Denise completes her probation she would have made several trips to the ATM and paid close to $13,000 or more.
Believe it or not, the financial loss is the least destructive consequence of anger. In fact when we speak of “person centered aggression”, it is the cost to the victim that supersedes any financial loss. Let us take a look at how anger can destroy the lives of others around you.
Shannon Munford M.A.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Temper Temper
Written By Daniel Steele
Baltimore Sun
This was a great weekend for anger-management trainers, and a bad one for proponents of such virtues as self-control and professionalism. Milton Bradley (in a tandem with umpire Eric Winters) and DeAngelo Hall seemed a little touchy. Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy, who we'll discuss in a subsequent post, took it to another level.
* The Padres are probably going to miss the playoffs because of what went down among Bradley, Winters, manager Bud Black and first base coach Bobby Meacham. Has a player-umpire confrontation ever done so much damage? The only one that comes to mind is the Roberto Alomar spitting incident, and that damaged Alomar's image more than anything. It didn't affect the pennant race; the Orioles already were locked into a playoff berth (which tells you how long ago it happened). It's interesting to note, though, that both the Alomar case and the blow-up in San Diego involve allegations of umpire name-calling. It's just as interesting that the reaction by fans and others has been that no matter what vile thing Winters is accused of saying to Bradley (Meacham, the coach, backed up Bradley's story), it's all Bradley's fault for taking the alleged bait, a textbook case of the victim's reputation preceding him. If Bradley is Ron Artest, then Winters appears to be a combination of Ben Wallace and the fan who threw the cup.
Meanwhile, manager Bud Black has to be a basket case by now. He was only doing his job, trying to keep his player from bum-rushing the ump and getting suspended -- and he ends up wrenching the guy's knee. It's a miracle, actually, that it hasn't happened more often, the way some players and coaches have to be restrained sometimes -- and how often umps keep arguments going long after they should have ended. OK, it's another one of those dumb baseball traditions, umpires and managers/players going eye-to-eye and saliva gland-to-saliva gland. But it's completely unacceptable from both sides in every other sport known to man -- and thus, there are no other incidents that come to mind of someone blowing out an ACL arguing with an ump.
Bottom line: Bradley should get a refund for the anger-management classes he took a few years ago; Winters, the ump, should sign up for some of his own, and Black should work on his footwork and leverage for next time he's wrestling one of his own players.
* If what DeAngelo Hall did on Sunday in Atlanta when his Falcons lost to Carolina has ever been matched -- he was personally responsible for 67 penalty yards on one possession, including two personal fouls -- I beg you to let me know here. And it happened to be on the drive on which Carolina tied the game and never looked back. Plus, all the penalties were against wideout Steve Smith, and the last one was, basically, for running his mouth too much after the play was over -- a third-down play that was about to force Carolina to try a long field goal, but instead kept the drive alive.
And, as Smith himself described the so-called "trash talk,'' "They were real minute ... just real immature stuff.'' Take his word for it, he's an expert in the field.
Now, talking stuff per se is not a problem, especially if it's good stuff and a player can back it up. Hall usually scores on both counts. He was, in fact, backing it up against Smith that day, until that drive. Then, a 37-yard interference call. Then a cheap shot on Smith at the line of scrimmage away from the ball. Then the mouthing off to Smith as he left the field.
Now, new coach Bobby Petrino plans to discipline Hall, and he hashed out ideas with his veterans, which tells you that it isn't just Petrino who's mad about this. Hall buried his own teammates by getting caught up in some stupid personal feud that could have been settled by a bunch of pithy quotes in the locker room after the game.
Bottom line: looks like the Falcons didn't get all the poison out of their locker room when Michael Vick was sent up the river.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Baltimore Sun
This was a great weekend for anger-management trainers, and a bad one for proponents of such virtues as self-control and professionalism. Milton Bradley (in a tandem with umpire Eric Winters) and DeAngelo Hall seemed a little touchy. Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy, who we'll discuss in a subsequent post, took it to another level.
* The Padres are probably going to miss the playoffs because of what went down among Bradley, Winters, manager Bud Black and first base coach Bobby Meacham. Has a player-umpire confrontation ever done so much damage? The only one that comes to mind is the Roberto Alomar spitting incident, and that damaged Alomar's image more than anything. It didn't affect the pennant race; the Orioles already were locked into a playoff berth (which tells you how long ago it happened). It's interesting to note, though, that both the Alomar case and the blow-up in San Diego involve allegations of umpire name-calling. It's just as interesting that the reaction by fans and others has been that no matter what vile thing Winters is accused of saying to Bradley (Meacham, the coach, backed up Bradley's story), it's all Bradley's fault for taking the alleged bait, a textbook case of the victim's reputation preceding him. If Bradley is Ron Artest, then Winters appears to be a combination of Ben Wallace and the fan who threw the cup.
Meanwhile, manager Bud Black has to be a basket case by now. He was only doing his job, trying to keep his player from bum-rushing the ump and getting suspended -- and he ends up wrenching the guy's knee. It's a miracle, actually, that it hasn't happened more often, the way some players and coaches have to be restrained sometimes -- and how often umps keep arguments going long after they should have ended. OK, it's another one of those dumb baseball traditions, umpires and managers/players going eye-to-eye and saliva gland-to-saliva gland. But it's completely unacceptable from both sides in every other sport known to man -- and thus, there are no other incidents that come to mind of someone blowing out an ACL arguing with an ump.
Bottom line: Bradley should get a refund for the anger-management classes he took a few years ago; Winters, the ump, should sign up for some of his own, and Black should work on his footwork and leverage for next time he's wrestling one of his own players.
* If what DeAngelo Hall did on Sunday in Atlanta when his Falcons lost to Carolina has ever been matched -- he was personally responsible for 67 penalty yards on one possession, including two personal fouls -- I beg you to let me know here. And it happened to be on the drive on which Carolina tied the game and never looked back. Plus, all the penalties were against wideout Steve Smith, and the last one was, basically, for running his mouth too much after the play was over -- a third-down play that was about to force Carolina to try a long field goal, but instead kept the drive alive.
And, as Smith himself described the so-called "trash talk,'' "They were real minute ... just real immature stuff.'' Take his word for it, he's an expert in the field.
Now, talking stuff per se is not a problem, especially if it's good stuff and a player can back it up. Hall usually scores on both counts. He was, in fact, backing it up against Smith that day, until that drive. Then, a 37-yard interference call. Then a cheap shot on Smith at the line of scrimmage away from the ball. Then the mouthing off to Smith as he left the field.
Now, new coach Bobby Petrino plans to discipline Hall, and he hashed out ideas with his veterans, which tells you that it isn't just Petrino who's mad about this. Hall buried his own teammates by getting caught up in some stupid personal feud that could have been settled by a bunch of pithy quotes in the locker room after the game.
Bottom line: looks like the Falcons didn't get all the poison out of their locker room when Michael Vick was sent up the river.
Daybreak Counseling Service
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Anger Management Classes-Daybreak Counseling Service
Daybreak Counseling Service provides quality anger management classes, anger management courses and anger management executive coaching. Classes are taught by Masters level professional in a non-judgemental enviroment. Anger Management classes are available to adults, adolescents, couples. Seminars are available for corporations and goverment agencies.
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
www.daybreakservices.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/angryinla
http://myspace.com/angermanagementeacher
310-995-1202
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
